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sometimes blue
DrewI am a thirty something married gay boy living in Sydney, almost on top of the gay scene but not in it! Why Sometimes blue?, because I love blue, but also I am sometimes blue :)
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Tuesday, January 15, 2002

I have a company

I know it sounds weird, but I have registerd a business name and am about to register as a fully incorporated company. It feels really weird not to have to go to work at a set time in the morning and have an office to go to. But it's a step that I should have taken a long time ago when the company I was working for was going down the toilet without anyone leading the company.
It's scary because I no longer have a regular income and have to get my own work or I don't get money, so I am the master of my own destiny really. Lee is great with the whole thing, including my rather up and down stress levels. Sometimes I feel really positive about starting up for myself and then at other times I feel really worried and scared of failure. I am sure that fear of failure is normal for someone in my situation, but even though it may be normal, it is still scary.
Oh well, I have to get a new notebook computer, software, letterheads, business cards, marketing material and so so much more. I am also building up the new company website with all the research and fully accessible and usable standards.
Wish me luck!

Saturday, January 12, 2002

Old and Boring

Obviously I must be getting old and boring because I never want to go out and drink at night anymore. I am quite content to stay at home, cooking dinner with the boy, drinking wine and watching DVD's snuggling on the sofa. Now don't get me wrong I love snuggling with the boy and spending time with him, but I feel as though we should be hitting the clubs still like our other friends instead of acting out the pensioner routine.
But I am so over the scene and the clubs, I don't have any reason to sit or stand there looking around at the procession of boys, daddy's and assorted others as they go through their desperate mating rituals. I am not picking anyone up, and as soon as somone approaches us we throw the barrier up, they get the message and walk away.
I don't feel the need to pay ten dollars for a beer and shout at someone over the din of this weeks 'cool' music. If I want to go out, I'll go to ARQ and dance from 11:30 - 6 am, get lost in the music, move our bodies and escape from reality for a while.
So obvioulsy I must be getting old and boring, but you know what - I like it, when we do venture out to club, it's special, it's fun and the old feelings of excitement are there, it's not routine, it's not tacky, we're not scene queens.

Wednesday, January 09, 2002

Finally back Home

We have finally returned to Australia and I have started to respond to the mountain of email I have recieved over the last couple of weeks. I apologise in advance if anyone has been waiting for a reply from me and they think I have been ignoring them or not wanting to reply. Rest assured you will get a reply soon!
We had a fabulous time in Europe and was so sad to leave all our friends behind when we left, but we will see them all again very soon indeed. The cold weather was certainly a shock to our systems and we had never expected that temperatures could get so damn cold.
Since getting back I have been sitting around looking for new work and starting to evaluate the idea of starting my own business, now that I have no job, as the company has ceased to exist. All I know is that I could never sit at home and be a kept man, as i like working far too much. With the global economic situation it is harder to find good work at the moment but I will find something relatively soon and I am very positive about that.
Anyway I will ahev some more chapters of the story posted soon enoough once I get through all my notes and start to edit what I have already edited. I will also be posting all the pics from the trip once I have converted them all to smaller images, but that will take some time as there are a lot of them and some of them will have to be censored (no not like that - some people just dont want their pictures on the web).
So start sending me email again and I will reply soon
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