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sometimes blue
DrewI am a thirty something married gay boy living in Sydney, almost on top of the gay scene but not in it! Why Sometimes blue?, because I love blue, but also I am sometimes blue :)
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Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Clients from Hell

I have a very lucrative client right now who has the social and communication skills of a brass tack.

IE no communication or social skills

There is nothing worse than someone who sends nasty emails that are factually incorrect. In fact I go one of these emails today which basically told me I was an idiot and asking in sarcastic terms whether they were ever going to get their deliverable. Even the boy was shocked at the rudeness of the email when I showed him.

It would have been somewhat deserved if the deliverable in question had not been fully delivered and notified last week when asked for.

I find that a lot people who run small business have a very low EQ or Emotional Quotient, and it's part of the reason why they run small businesses.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to perceive emotions, to access
and generate emotions so as to assist thought, to understand emotions and
emotional knowledge, and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote
emotional and intellectual growth.

Source: Wikipedia

It's totally contradictory because you would expect someone to need to have a high EQ to run a small business. Isn't the whole idea of running your own business meaning that you need to attract clients?

Mind you I run a small business and in the main I hate most of my clients they tend to drive me bonkers. But that's probably why I am aiming to remove myself from so much client facing time anyway.

The warning bells on this guy should have clanged off when he said one of his staff was stupid because she was 6 months pregnant and then started telling me about his idiot ex wives (three).

The problem is the project is very lucrative and because of the client's total lack of decision making ability the scope has increased which means we charge more and end up making a considerably larger profit on the project.

I however would prefer to have them finish this damn project so I no long have to put up with them.

My back is much better today and I really wanted to go to the gym tonight, but my throat has been hurting the last couple of days and I have no intention of making myself ill. So instead I Will behave myself and wait till tomorrow when I will do yoga and some cardio.

On other notes I'm also stressed with the whole office situation right now. I share an office with another company and there just seems to be a growing distance and frostiness between us and them. I think allot of it has to do with the fact that I keep my door closed so the beagle doesn't jump on either the staff or visitors.

Or maybe it's just the full moon!


Monday, July 30, 2007

Vote for Eye Candy

Thomas from this year's Big Brother is smokingly hot, and not to mention huge at 6ft6 (sorry honey he beats you by two inches LOL).
DNA magazine has asked it's readers to vote on whether they should photograph him in an underwear or swimwear issue.

If you want to see Thomas in all his beautiful straight perfection on the cover and pages of DNA Magazine click here to vote!
With a body like that as a real estate agent he should move to some gay ghetto and concentrate on selling gay boys over priced properties at exorbitant prices by doing the open house inspections shirtless.


Round the world in twenty days

For my birthday present this year we're going to mix business with pleasure and go round the world. The boy constantly travels overseas to America and Asia, but I generally only get to travel internationally about once a year on average.

So the plan is to intertwine the boy's schedule in the States and Asia with my desire to see Friends in the UK, Finland and the States, coupled with a dirty weekend in Paris and some work meetings for me in San Francisco and San Jose.
The schedule looks like:
  • Sydney
  • Hong Kong for three days
  • Oluo Finland for four days
  • Paris for three days
  • Exeter for three days
  • Las Vegas for two days
  • LA for three or four days
  • SF / SJ for three days
  • Home!
All this in just under three weeks elapsed and the boy will join me in Finland, the UK and Paris and then head off back to the States where I will meet him in Vegas and then spend the rest f the time with him.

All this planned for September and October, I am so damn excited because I have not seen the girls in Finland for about five years, although the friends in the UK have been over to Australia two years ago.


Bloggers Meet wrap

A few of the Sydney bloggers got together last night at the Tilbury hotel for a small but fun get together. It was nice to see old friends Brenton, SITCG, Narcicus & Dan, and also nice to meet Gus and his partner Adam.

And Adam you made my night by not believing me when I told you my age and insisting on seeing my drivers license!

We only stayed till early as we had pre-booked tickets to see Harry Potter which was very good and very dark!


Sunday, July 29, 2007

Weight Watchers points

My sister is currently on the weight watchers diet and is doing pretty well in her first two weeks.

Overall she has managed to lose 3kgs so far which is a pretty good feat. Personally I am the fattest and heaviest I have ever been, somewhere between 74 - 76kgs, when with my current musculature I should be about 70 - 71kgs or there abouts. So I can stand to lose between 3 -5 kgs of fat

In my ever increasing obsession with getting back in shape I was researching on the web the whole points thing. Apart from the site I found of circa 1970s weight watchers recipe cards (yes the image is of frozen coffee on a stick) that reminded me of my mother's collection of these cards I did find some fascinating other information.

Based on my weight I should be getting somewhere up to 27 points a day which would be approximately 1200 calories which personally I think is ridiculous. But the whole concept of points as opposed to calories is a lot easier for me to understand.

That coupled with the fact that I can still have some chocolate and alcohol.

Which brings me to the other issue, I think based on how much I drink that I really should cut it down significantly to maybe either only vodka lime and soda (that's actual limes not lime cordial) and one glass of wine a day or only one glass of wine in total.

It's a choice I have to decide I want to make how important is regaining and then maintaining my body vs eating badly. Mind you the positive health outcome of eating well is also something for me to think about too.

While I think of it there is picture taken of me in about 2000 when I was visiting the girls in Finland where one of them had lifted up my shirt and I had the best abs I ever had. I really must find that photo and scan it so I can show what my obsessed body looked like back then!

I think what I really need is to find a regular dependable gym buddy, someone who can help me at the gym and I can help them.

Crap I seem to get really obsessed every winter about this!

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Strained Back

Yesterday about half way through my morning workout I managed to twist the top of my body one way and twist the middle the other. All while doing arm raises with 20kg dumbbells.

The result?

A bloody sore and strained back right in the middle of my back. I know this pain cause I have had it many many many times before. I have always had a weakness in my spine at this point, predominantly due to a very slight curve in my spine (scoliosis).

So doing most normal things like, walking, sitting etc are all a bit painful. When I move around I have to be quit cognisant of my back.

The real downside apart from the pain is I will have to forgo the gym for at least a couple of days or at least until I have full movement back.

The best way to deal with it I have found is to stretch, take pain killers and Valium. The Valium helps to relax the muscles that are all spasming and stops me from tensing up the rest of the muscles in compensation.
I am not sure whether it's the pain killers or the Valium from last night but I seem to have much more movement and less muscle tightness today, so I may at the very least get some cardio in tomorrow.

Even with the back pain we did wander around Fountaingate (Bondi Westfield) yesterday with Army Boy who is just back from a sex holiday in Hawaii. Army Boy is one of our closest friends and is a constant source of great amusement, he has a dirty potty mouth, is one of the most honest and practical people I know and loves to shock.

In addition to this he also has an insatiable sexual appetite and is constantly perving on hot boys or talking about the boys he has slept with or is planning to, or like yesterday all three at once LOL!

At one point he bounded off across the shopping center in chase of some hot boy that he spied, coming back at a run with the " he's a lay by, too young" (read under 20). The fact that the kid was walking around holding his girlfriend's hand was irrelevant to Army Boy.

I love it because if I could get away with it I would probably bound after hot boys too, instead I just stare and provide a running commentary for which my boy constantly berates me.

Among the many boys that Army Boy met while on his holiday one event in particular is priceless. While deep throating some huge marine's cock he threw up all over him, but this didn't put either of them off instead they just moved to the shower to finish up, and he did get seconds with the guy the next night too. Priceless!
But by far the best comment he made about his holiday was when two Aussie guys tried to pick him up, and he told them that he was there to sleep with Americans cause he can sleep with Aussies at home any time he likes. *sigh ever the practical boy he is!

While at the shopping centre we did look at the puppies (OK I always look at the puppies), there was the cutest little ten week old beagle.
We would love to get a second beagle as a playmate for Lucy, but there are so many logistical problems.
For starters we have a two seat car and it's being replaced in January with another two seat car. As it is it's not the most comfortable thing having the beagle on my map when we take her places, but two would be impossible!
Walking two beagles would be somewhat like adjudicating the IRAQ mess, and I am not sure how the company I share an office with would deal with me having two beagles in the office.

Mind you I am not really sure that I want to go through the whole puppy training phase again. Lucy is finally starting to act like a grown up dog and her bad behaviour is getting less.

The problem is compounded by every beagle owner I have ever met or spoken to telling us that two beagles are in fact better for each other than one. They are serious pack animals and Lucy is no exception to this rule, she craves attention and needs people or other dogs around her or she gets destructive.

So I will be at the bloggers drinks tonight at the Tilbury hopefully not hobbling around in pain too much and I am looking forward to seeing people and catching up on gossip etc.


Saturday, July 28, 2007

Apparently I am still fixated

I had dinner with my sister on Thursday night, not something I do all that often as I am not exceptionally close to her.

The issue of her calling me fixated on the whole gay thing came up in conversation, read I bought it up.

I wanted to explain to her that it was more than a fixation, it is important to me, to gay people in general. But she just doesn't get it, she does not understand the need for people to champion things like gay rights.

She does not understand the need for equality for all people let alone gay people.

I find it amazing that even though we grew up learning virtually the same things and having the same experiences up until about twelve or so when I first started to understand my sexuality.

She is still unable to understand and embrace the world in which she lives.

There was nothing 'wrong' with my childhood as such. I was bought up in a loving caring family in a protective, physically and emotionally safe way. My family's world view was narrower than some, but that's not a criticism, more an observation.

According to my mother's world view, there are two types of people in the world, 'our sort of people', and everyone else.

It's not meant as malice if someone was not 'our sort of people' more a misguided surface view of what construed 'our sort of people'.

So with this in mind my sister and I were exposed to all the same experiences, values and beliefs, about twelve is where my learning and knowledge went of in a totally different direction to my life.

I discovered that I was far more interested in boys bits than girls bits.

Even though my family was surrounded by 'gay people' they were always talked about in a way that was made clear that they were 'not our sort of people'. So you can imagine that I became adept at hiding these feelings and had two persona's.

I also started to find my own values and these didn't really subscribe to the our sort of people theory.

Strangely enough my sister was the one who seemed to display the most homophobia of all my family. I remember when she was at university some girl made a pass at her and she flew totally off the handle. Silly really considering she had a habit for falling in love with boys who would go out with her and then come out of the closet!

I don't think my father actually has an opinion on sexuality really. He was bought up in a wildly bohemian family environment and was exposed to more than his fair share of eccentrics growing up and I think he just takes it all in his stride.

I think that my sister still just simply get that sexuality is not a choice.

In some ways I have got closer to my sister in the last few months as we do talk about our respective anxiety issues. But in the important stuff like actually understanding and the fundamental issue of acceptance she and I are worlds apart.

Yes I am fixated on gay rights and I will continue to be so!

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Friday, July 27, 2007

drunk astronauts

I can't resist this one.
Apparently on at least two occasions Astronauts have been drunk when they were blasted into space!
I certainly woudlnt want a hang over in space!



Thursday, July 26, 2007

London Preppy Boy

I love it when I find a really cool new blog and I immediately spend hours and hours reading back over the distant history of thoughts! So you can imagine my surprise when:

a) I found a blog written well;
b) one that was humorous;
c) written by one hell of a spunk; and he
d) obsesses over his body as much as I seem to!

Seriously though this guys is smokingly hot and writes a very well crafted humorous and at times quite self deprecating blog.

So I suggest all your self loathing, shallow individuals like me should make this a daily read :)

Without further ado I give you - London Preppy Boy!

Oh and I so needed good inspiration for the gym and now here it is!
I might say one thing, in reading his blog I have discovered he has been on at least four covers of magazines, two more than me LOL! He however looks good enough to freeze dry and place in your living room as a sculpture!

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Something Pretty


Monday, July 23, 2007

the boy's away

The boy's away in China and so I am wandering around with the puppy all lonely :(

At least he is back on Saturday :)

and the puppy is very cute

Thursday, July 19, 2007

John Howard Sleeping


Wednesday, July 18, 2007


For my actual birthday on Monday night the boy and I went to my sister's for dinner with my parents. I always find this a stressful as much as I love my family, my sister and parents have become even less in touch with reality as they get older.

I suppose in many ways my family and especially my mother were cushioned from the day to day true reality of life, and her views are very much still based or stuck in the 1950s on most topics.

She still believes that a wife should really stay home, that managers do no work, and that most people work 9-5!

One of my biggest bugbears is her fervent support of John Howard because 'he is such a nice man and he even washes up'. She cannot and will not believe that he lies, and she has this elitist snobbish attitude that drives me bonkers.

My teenage years were very much spent battling my parents (mothers) views and these have been ingrained into my sister now too. Coming out for me was not an easy experience and there is still a great deal of latent homophobia in my family.

In fact my sister who quite frankly should know better accused me 'of being a bit fixated on the whole gay rights issue'.

You can imagine how much that was like waving a red flag at a bull!

Of course I am fixated on the 'gay rights issue'. Equality is an issue that is about as basic a human right for basic respect as you can get.

There are so many issues with my family that just drive me potty, these just being the ones that are most commonly raised.

If you asked my family they would say that they have always been supportive of me. But if you scratched the surface it wasn't support at all, more like coercion, sneaky tactics and more often than not strong arm tactics to get me to do what they wanted.

Unfortunately due to their age and their stubbornness you cannot argue with them, they just either do not listen or do not understand complex arguments (or simple for that matter) anymore.

I had thought as the years had passed and I had grown into adulthood and have been out of the closet now for seventeen or so years that they would get it, but they just don't.

In all of this they are becoming less able to deal with the realities of the world and this fantasy world is being pushed upon my sister too, who at 38 is still waiting to be married so she can be 'complete'. (because there must be a problem with a girl if she is not married according to my mother).

I think at the end of the day what upsets me the most is their blind support of a political party that actively discriminates against me, in fact many of it's members would advocate the re criminalisation of homosexuality and have us thrown in jail.

And when I try to point this out I am told I am a bit fixated on the gays rights issue.

I do love them I just wish they would actually be supportive!

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Monday, July 16, 2007

So onto the weekends wrap up

Friday night we had friends over for drinks and canapes to celebrate the start of my Birthday weekend which was fantastic and for once even the dog semi behaved by not trying to most everyone that came through the door.

After the drinks a large number of us moved on to upstairs at the Midnight Shift for more dancing and frivolity. After hours and hours and hours of dancing chatting and carrying on we moved on to Arq nightclub which was only open downstairs.

The music was awesome and the crowd was really mixed and lots of fun.

Then we wandered across the road to Manacle, which as always was fully the the rafters of fun and happy people.

Sometime around midday we went home and then were invited to a recovery at someones apartment near by which we went off to.

All in all a huge weekend and was great meeting new and really interesting people!

I think the highlight for me though was the very sweet young guy who was so convinced I was lying about my age that he made me show him my license :)

Thanks ...

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Hmmmmm somehow I feel like somethingon this menu

Happy Birthday to me! Details of the trashiest weekend on record to follow

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Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Training the beagle

A most important issue when you live in an apartment and have a dog is toilet training. Getting the dog to do her business in the right spot can be a frustrating experience.
Lucy was relatively easy to train in that she uses the downstairs bathroom as the place to go toilet. The problem is she goes right in the middle of the bathroom floor.
It means that we end up mopping up several times an evening (she is in office during the day and doesn't go to the toilet until she gets home).
We have been trying to get her to go into the shower stall where it is easier to just turn the shower on to clean. Every now and then she has gone in there but almost always reverts back.
On the weekend at a Friends place their dog goes out on their balcony on plastic grass, so we decided that we would try this too.
So the first night we put the grass in the shower stall and covered it in some pee (hers not mine) and some puppy training spray too.
She totally ignored the grass and continued to pee right in the middle of the bathroom floor.
Next day we moved the grass to the middle of the bathroom thinking we could convince he to pee on this and then move it in.
Guess what?
She pees around the bloody grass!
All I want is her to pee int he shower stall, is it too much to ask?


Motivation & Timing

The last couple of months I have been slack as all hell at the gym. What with the workload, shorter days and a general tiredness of trying to fit everything in to the day I didnt really go to the gym more than once a week at the most for about three months.

The result of this is a definite increase in the old waist size and a general lack of fitness.

For the last few weeks though I have been back at the gym, certainly not as reguarly as I would like and I have not yet been really pushing myself for fear of overdoing it and pulling a muscle. But now I am starting to get back into the swing of things and have committed myself to get back to the gym and start working towards those fitness goals.

Of course it has nothing to do with the fact that next MOnday I will be turning 35, God Forbid no! I don't feel any older or wiser than I did ten years ago...

And it still feels like I am 25. Is this waht it's like getting older? You lose perspective on the years and it all starts to merge into one?

Who knows if that's what its like for everyone else, but it certainly does feel like that for me!

Back to the gym though and my warped body image issues though, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, oir just at the gym.

Something that offers extensive, and I mean extensive motivation to get to the gym.

Oh lordy me he is the absolute perfect specimin of a male, sexy, hot and seems both confident and vulnerable all at the same time.

And of course the fact that he is a nice guy well that just takes the cake!
So I have great eye candy, I mean motivation to go the gym and work out hard!

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Monday, July 09, 2007

Another Rainy Day in Sydney

I do love the rain!

Saturday, July 07, 2007

It's been a long few weeks

For the first time in a few weeks I am not going to work all day Saturday and Sunday!

Instead I am going to turn my computer off and have some time to relax and spend time with friends. The last couple of weeks have been particularly stressful and busy with lots of client projects to get through and lots of small (and sometimes large bumps) in the road.

Having your own business is always a challenge especially when things get busy and you have to start working 12 hour days seven days a week just to do the stuff you were supposed to have done a month ago.

When you finish one thing off of your to do list you always know there is more to do, and invariably you end up prioritising the priorities themselves.

I tend to try and group things into client deliverables that need to be done first, then the tactical stuff that needs to be done and then when I have time the more strategic stuff.

The problem is though that if you have lofty goals you have to consistently work on the strategic stuff and make sure your tactics are moving you forward to achieve these goals.

But there is a catch, the more day to day client work you have the less time you actually have to be strategic and so you end up being reactive in business rather than proactive.

One of the biggest thing I have learned from starting a small business from scratch is that it always takes three times as much money, effort and time!

Anyway enough of my thoughts on business and off the computer will go!

The sun is shining and the puppy is barking at the boy for some attention.


Friday, July 06, 2007

Help I'm in Fire!

Buy the Calendar


Thursday, July 05, 2007

Lucy's Dogster Profile


Make your own badge


John Howard Heckled by Speeedo Man

The very attractive Josh Brown Heckled the Prime Minister Yesterday in nothing but a pair of speedos! I for one would like to say that we need more hecklers like Josh! Bring them on!

Source SMH


Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Contrary to popular belief I am alive

Yes I am alive.

Just very busy with huge workloads and huge amounts of stress to go along with it!

I will pull my finger out and write a longer blog later with news and updates on all sorts of fabulousness!


Monday, July 02, 2007

Oh the Irony

I was reading this nasty misguided editorial on Bush's Appointment of the anti gay nominee for Surgeon general.

When I noticed something.

Can you guess what the irony is?
Have a go in comments!

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